L.L. Uncool J(eans) « That’s What She Blogged

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L.L. Uncool J(eans)

March 25, 2008 by Allison

As I was flipping through the new L.L. Bean catalog, I encountered an image that both frightened and horrified me:

Please tell me that mom jeans aren’t the new style. Would any self-respecting woman be seen in these jeans? Would any red-blooded man be attracted to a woman wearing these jeans? I know that L.L. Bean is not considered a leading trend-setter, but it shouldn’t aim to remove all semblance of a woman’s dignity either. I’m pretty sure that Stacy and Clinton would not approve.

Posted in Fashion, Humor, Life, Men, Women, shopping | Tagged What not to wear | 40 Comments

40 Responses to “L.L. Uncool J(eans)”

on March 25, 2008 at 5:44 pm1 jenefur

You know you ordered 2 pair.
on March 25, 2008 at 5:47 pm2 Billy

Oh my…Oh my.

I like to imagine that she can’t bend her knees. She just walks stiff legged. It’s the new thing, you know.
on March 25, 2008 at 5:48 pm3 Red

Umm . . ew.
on March 25, 2008 at 6:28 pm4 angiebledsoe

Found this on tag surfer…can’t look away - want to so bad, but can’t!!! I don’t know what’s worse: the top or the high-water bottoms. Thanks for the comic relief. Peace.
on March 25, 2008 at 7:55 pm5 morethananelectrician

Someone took her hips away…photoshopped!
on March 25, 2008 at 10:17 pm6 Traci

LOVE the reference to Stacy and Clinton. They would have a field day with this lady. Ew. How the heck does anyone even BREATHE in jeans that high?!
on March 26, 2008 at 12:24 am7 Luke

This picture immediately reminded me of a certain movie poster, and… well…

See for yourself.
on March 26, 2008 at 6:56 am8 dobeman

Please tell me you photoshopped this???

Nothing says “hot mom” like thick denim!
“UUUMMM, I likes musturd on my french fried potaters.”

Are you sure you didn’t get the “LL Bean, Holiness Edition”?

Oh yeah, I offended at least .0023% of the population just now!
on March 26, 2008 at 7:15 am9 Catie

Holy … to add insult to injury, they’re too short! For the love of God, if you’re going to wear jeans that double as a bra, cover your ankles, too!
on March 26, 2008 at 7:38 am10 Glassowater

Nothing says ’sexxy’ like formless, amorphous denim. I think you can tell even the model seems to think “Good lord! Get me out of these curve nullifying jeans!”…that pained smile, the distracted expression….
on March 26, 2008 at 8:00 am11 Sarah

Good grief. I didn’t realize anyone even still made jeans that went up that high. That’s not even a high waist, that’s like an empire waist pair of jeans.
on March 26, 2008 at 8:43 am12 Taoist Biker

Yep, no need for a belt, these stay up via a pin hammered into your sternum. (I totally stole that from Jim Lileks and his Dorcus Collection. Wahoo for the Institute of Official Cheer!)

And I agree with morethananelectrician - what the hell?!? They taper OUT from the waist and straight down from the butt. a) Where are her hips? and b) Who on earth would wear something that falls off your ass that way? I know I’m hardly a fashionista, SKIRTS that fall that way aren’t even in style, are they?

Oh, and can I call it? Total man hands.
on March 26, 2008 at 9:17 am13 Lucky

There is NO way Stacy and Clinton would approve. I am so disappointed with LL Bean.

Those.
Are.
Horrible.

Taoist - Good call on the man hands. The Institute is awesome. I’m always excited to come across people who have seen it.
on March 26, 2008 at 9:35 am14 pogoyogamama

That is very disturbing. I am going to have nightmares now, and wake up screaming “I wont wear mom jeans! You can’t make me!”
on March 26, 2008 at 10:16 am15 bloggy

Would any red-blooded man be attracted to a woman wearing these jeans?

Sure! We don’t look at the jeans on the woman, we envision the jeans lying on the bedroom floor.
on March 26, 2008 at 12:40 pm16 Peter Parkour

Those a freakish looking. It looks like her legs come right out of her ribcage. I’m thinking that would put her ass crack between her shoulder blades. FREAKISH!!!
on March 26, 2008 at 12:41 pm17 Peter Parkour

Are!
Those ARE freakish looking.
on March 26, 2008 at 1:19 pm18 stopbouncing

while catalog shopping, my rule of thumb is “If it looks bad on the model, it will look retched on me.”

I believe these pants illustrate this point.

(and now I have the SNL “Mom Pants!” skit re-running in my head)
on March 26, 2008 at 2:12 pm19 duffboy

Yeah, that sketch is hilarious! This image will haunt me forever…
on March 26, 2008 at 2:18 pm20 Black Coffee & Bourbon

those are scary. i hope i never see a pair of those in person… on anyone.
on March 26, 2008 at 3:28 pm21 2lazydogs

Oh.My.God. Those are awful. Just what every woman wants - a waistband that reaches her boobs!
on March 26, 2008 at 4:32 pm22 pamajama

This model cannot weight more than 105. The only thing that could make these better is to pull them up over a pot belly.
on March 26, 2008 at 6:05 pm23 TRO

Hmm, I’d hit that.
on March 26, 2008 at 7:29 pm24 Allison

I thoroughly enjoyed all of the comments on this one, including the cleverly photoshopped movie poster.

And to the two guys who either said or implied that they would “hit that”, surely you jest.
on March 26, 2008 at 7:43 pm25 Pammy Girl

I suppose if I were a model and got paid 10K a an hour to wear “mom jeans”, I’d do it. But since the word FIERCE did not come out of Tyra Banks mouth during my ill-fated attempt to be on America’s Next Top Model, I’m more likely to be seen wearing my Mork and Mindy suspenders coupled with knee-high socks, a My Little Pony t-shirt, Daisy Dukes and clogs.
on March 26, 2008 at 8:54 pm26 kaylee2

yucK!!!!!!!
on March 27, 2008 at 6:58 am27 bloggy

And to the two guys…surely you jest.

I’m sorry, but I still don’t see the jeans in question from the above picture.
on March 27, 2008 at 7:07 am28 Allison

Bloggy- The high waist line (especially in the back), the high-water inseam, the all-day comfort clogs??? She’s pretty, I’ll give you that…but her smile must be forced.
on March 27, 2008 at 8:37 am29 TRO

I never jest about hitting it.
on March 27, 2008 at 10:22 am30 Taoist Biker

She’s pretty? I still say [Austin]it’s a man, baby, yeah![/Austin]
on March 27, 2008 at 11:29 am31 Mac and Cheese

Stacey and Clinton would go to town on the jokes with this ensemble. I did hear that the high-wasted jean is making a comeback, but I’m no longer a trend follower. I’ll pass.
on March 27, 2008 at 11:30 am32 bloggy

She’s pretty, I’ll give you that…but her smile must be forced.

Okay I fess, I see the horse-manure-shoveling-jeans, but I don’t think the smile is forced. More like a grimace. I think anyone with pants wedged up their crotch like that would have a similar look on their face.

And unlike TRO, I DO joke about “hitting it” (although I don’t think I said it quite that crudely). I’m WAY TOO shy in reality. :-0
on March 27, 2008 at 8:00 pm33 romi41

ick..ick..ick! I will start wearing a flowered moo-moo before I put on a pair of those hideous mom-jeans, and holy crap, the “all day comfort clogs” are NOT helping her cause…
on March 27, 2008 at 8:40 pm34 karmental

Two things came to mind when I saw these jeans:
Camel toe and tucking my boobs into the waist band. The model does look like she’s looking for an escape route, doesn’t she?
Check out the cheesy wedding band to polish off the the look. I think LL is targeting the aging granola baby boomers with this lovely ensemble.
on March 28, 2008 at 6:53 am35 Allison

Romi- You know that your pooh pajamas are a million times hotter than those jeans

Karmental- Yes, I absolutely noticed the cheesy wedding band as if to say, “I’m married now. I don’t have to try to look hot anymore.”
on March 28, 2008 at 1:56 pm36 Ellen

Bravo, Allison! I worked at L.L. Bean for years, responsible for the fit of lovely jeans like that and I tell you, it wasn’t easy! I finally got out of the field all together, it was so traumatic. I wonder how it is that they are as successful as they are?
on March 28, 2008 at 2:04 pm37 Ellen

By the way, Allison, your blog was brought to my attention by a friend who works at L.L. Bean. I hope the designers there get to read this!
on March 28, 2008 at 4:13 pm38 Allison

Ellen,

Thank you so much for leaving your comments. I went from 14 to 126 views of this post in just a couple of hours today and I was very perplexed about the cause.

Regarding your first comment, I certainly cannot understand success with the women’s clothing line. I’ve told myself that maybe I’m just not in their target market (I’m early 30’s), but they show 30ish women wearing these clothes in the catalog. I tend to order items for my dog from the catalog. I also like the monogrammed backpacks as they appear in the catalog (I don’t own one).

I hope designers or higher-ups telling designers what to design read this too.

Women are beautiful, and their bodies should be treated as such.

Thanks again,
Allison
on March 30, 2008 at 12:36 am39 Nancy

God that was funny. I was crying.

I encountered a woman wearing “mom jeans” a few months back. My husband and I were at dinner (sans kids) listening to a jazz trio. I looked up and see a mom with jeans that brushed up against her shoulder blades. She began dancing in true “mom jean” style (while her husband and two small children watched in horror). Every time we tried to look away her mom jean butt was in our face. It was a saturday night live skit in the flesh.
on March 30, 2008 at 8:01 am40 teachercarrieaz

Those are the most god awful jeans I have ever seen!

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